yea failed it..

lets say i jus gave up 20% of the grade. so generous of me.
it makes me wonder if i can really do well for my papers.
i practised and thought i knew the things. the world is cruel. if u missed ur chance, u fail to make ur mark.

maybe i just cant perform at a bigger stage. once in a while, accidents do happen, but when they keep happening, i guess it is just me.

u are not good enough when u are not.
face it.
let me hope for a better future.

dreams..

i am having quite alot of dreams.. this is a really weird one on Monday..

setting: i assume it should be in taiwan. (deductions from bits and pieces in the dream)
bought roadside food for 2, cost: $100+, chinese speaking environment.. a taiwan band was there too

story begins with (not once upon a time)..
i was walking with a girl (girl of my dreams.. i still can vividly remember the figure, the hair, the skin tone, the sweet voice.. ok back to the story) to her apartment. she seems to live in a shady apartment w alot of girls dressed only in bra&panties.. (so is she a pro?)

i waited for her to get changed & we went to the streets again. we had food at the roadside stall, walking slowly and munching the food, a nice normal date.. when she told me "RUN!" and she sprinted off. behind were 4-5 men with knives and parang chasing after her.. its like the typical HK movie when the gangsters chased after their target. i clearly remebered i was terrified, trying to hide in the backdrop of the street, hoping no one finds and hacks me.. after a few minutes, everyone was running in an opposite direction, then my date came back with a gang of people (including a Taiwan singer).. that was when i woke up.. i tried really hard to fall aslp again to revisit the dream.. hoping to solve the mysteries surrounding my date..

i guess the dream was modelled around my ideal gf.. but why is her background so complicated? there must be some hidden meaning to it..

today i had another dream, this time it was a crappy one w lots of people.. i dont remember any pretty gf in this dream, therefore, it wasnt worth the storage space in my brain.. yea.. a perfect excuse for forgetting the details of the dream.. will i dream more in the next few days?

hope everyone is doing fine.. it is irrelevant to the topic dreams..
bye bye

lies.. pretence.. facade..

i m tired..

whats the point of protecting others interests at the expense of ur close ones..
or is it protecting ur own damn interests (ur belief)..
if this is what they are preaching.. why should i even care abt how they think..
misunderstanding always occur when u view others w tainted glass...
one is stubbornly living in denial.. refuse to accept that he is wrong
the other is persistent, what she thinks must be done has to be done, worse of all, quickly, regardless of timing..

sigh..
when will they wake up?

how can i neglect this blog!!!?!!!

yes i can!
y not? i own it!

thats besides the point.. lets see.. whats there to update my loyal fans? if i have any..

i am a slacker.. i know it and i know it..

no more hows?! what to do?! CAP?! sometimes the things happening arnd u really set u thinking..

i forgot to wish her happy bday! lol i am a tart. this just means the relationship has gone platonic.. thats good..

new yr wishes:
1) peace in the house
2) a less emo mom
3) a more sensitive dad
4) finding someone who can live w my tarts :D it wont happen since i nv begin finding. F(t) = 0 when t = 0

meet more friends before chinese new year so that it feels good that i met them..

happy new year to everyone in advance!

qk = great
qk is assigned to great..