POP liao!!!

Passing Out Parade marks the end of BMT.. the last wk in camp was some exp i din expect i would go thru.. before BMT, i made it clear i would participate in any activity regardless of its difficulty.. however, after falling seriously ill for the 1st time, my wk was packed w duties for status recruits. Carryin jerry cans, setting up water points, loading of stores up n down the tonner, be an usher for 24km..

i missed quite alot of activities. SOC test, 24km, the rehearsals for Graduation Parade. After missing 2 consecutive parades, i was told tt i could only join in the re-entry doin the infantry roar. i had to fall out for the march pass and the inspection due to lack of practice. It was quite demoralising to hear tt.. took me for quite a few days to get over it.. resulting in a build of a bad temper, flaring up easily at slight provocation.. i had more confrontations w ppl for the last wk than the other 8 wks in BMT.. vulgarities flew..

finally "they" told me i could join in the parade (final rehearsal).. this time, i couldnt be bothered.. say tt i am slack.. i jus wasnt in the mood to join in.. i was quite sure my body isnt in its best condition. To make matter worse, my willpower wasnt there to support my physical status. I simply did some normal status duties and slpt in the bunk for 2 hours..

i dun think being a status recruit is chao keng as many others see it. a status recruit who refuses and find excuses to execute tasks like sweeping floor, cleaning and washing things is chao keng. Imagine 24km, there arent any status ppl to help u set up water points.. the support characters are impt if not more impt than the main grp which performs the duties..

now.. i am really in a dazy state.. wondering wat i can do next.. i hope to talk to someone.. but i noe it is impossible.. w simple calculations or analysis of the situation.. the chance of meeting is almost 0%. the answer is NO but with the slightest bit of room for negotiation.. i will jus haf to live w it.. gd luck..

anyw, POP liao.. no one will ask me out.. n i think i cant bring myself to take the iniative to ask ppl out too.. i jus ask too much.. n get too much rejections.. i shall rest.. guard duty awaits me..