there goes my movie?!?!

there was a moment of excitement when penguin told me she's free to be asked out for movies!!! woohooo.. i finally found myself some programmes!!!

projected movie outing plan
1. a grp of ppl (class girls) + me
2. watch oceans 13
3. tuesday

frankly speaking, i was overjoyed.. the feeling was like consuming de-ageing potion.. transforming back to some 6 yr old kid.. "yeah! i got my event of the wk!"

outing was postponed from tues to thurs.. due to some girls unable to make it.. well.. it's definitely great to haf more ppl joining in.. everything was goin fine (2-3 girls goin) until tonite.. one shock after another.. first 1 dropped out due to personal reasons.. den suddenly, it left w 3 ppl (including me).. den another dropped out.. 2 ppl..

conclusion: postponed! zzz.. i cant hide my disappointment.. esp after my dear mom asked "are u goin out tml?" wat can i say?!?! sadly, it's a NO.. sigh..

so basically so far this wk.. the most entertaining thing i've done was soccer this morning.. conceding some goals which will cause any audience "WOW!" and scoring a handful of goals.. my fitness is coming back (while i am still recovering from flu)..

as for now.. i oso cant describe how i feel now.. i am numbed.. without feelings.. experiencing the dilemma of to be "angry" or jus "forgiving".. i am quite glad i din snap at my mom's comments/reminders jus now..

my time to return to tt regimental lifestyle is really soon.. u can count w 1 hand.. omg!!! it's really hard to plan my "holiday" schedule w me falling ill.. unable to find ppl to go out w (guys in army.. girls.. sigh.. forget it.. it has always been rejections)..

mayb u can only depend on guys? success rates of askin guys out is so much higher.. most guys will do "seemingly stupid" things for guys.. well as for girls i've noticed.. they will do
"seemingly stupid" things for girls.. but a larger % of guys will do "seemingly stupid" things for girls as compared to the other way round.. girls are always the lucky ones.. i am turning sexist?! lol

congratulations.. i jus snapped at my mom.. she jus comments tooooooo much..

sigh..