my attitude..

bookout is gettin increasingly unattractive to me, the only incentive is the outings available (given tt i can arrange any). yst's bookout followed by soccer w my classmates den a class dinner at fish n co. if u exaggerate it abit, it was an extraordinary exp for it was such a long time i din meet them. everyone seems well and guess wat.. yien sat bside me!!! (exaggeration to it's max again) haha.. the evening was only soiled by the constantly coughin to clear my throat.

now i feel ok abt goin OCS.. i dont wish to aim for it.. i hate it when i aim for somethin n in the end failed to get it.. ippt was done last morning, i performed pretty well.. as promised to warren cheng, i got my gold (if the 2.4k timing din screw up, my watch shows 9:38). it feels great cos i managed to fulfil my promise. breaking a promise is a sin.

i am proud to say i am from 79. 17 guys.. 1 overseas. 6 in OCS.. 1 SISPEC to OCS.. 1 SISPEC to MO(captain?!).. 1 MEDIC.. 1 ADMIN.. 1 SIGNAL.. 5 in BMT.. we are PHYSICALLY FIT!!! weiheng.. haha.. admin!!! lol.. no one in section 2 can win him in chin-up.. lol.. everyone is different.. chengyen running under 10.. doin a lot of chin-ups, 17? basically.. we are jus damn fit.. lol.. class spirit is always stronger than section spirit.. we spent more time tog. lol.

OCS.. if i managed to get in.. (heck the tough training.. if i say i can do it.. i can do it..) my PW grp will be 4/4 OCS.. lol.. tt's pride again after the being the "lousiest" grp.. 4 ppl getting 3s and a single 2.. sigh..

life in tekong is getting more mundane.. some ppl are pissing me off too.. i cant say tt they are selfish (all the time) but at certain times.. i jus cant take it. it is quite true tt most ppl only talk n dont do at all.. say bringing in food.. in the end.. sigh.. i smuggled in food even though i forecasted tt might be some checks.. as a promise to bring, i bring.. the rest (esp those who declared loudly tt they would bring in) simply eats.. i am fine w ppl eating my stuff but not breaking a promise becos of the risks involved to bring in food.. mayb i expect too much from others again..

some other selfish acts: opening my cupboard to take somethin w/o my permission and NOT LOCKING IT due to "forgetfulness". to me, it is jus taking something which is not urs for granted n fk care abt the rest since ur objective is met. the thing u want is w u.. the rest is none of ur business.. i despise this kinda acts. happily getting wat u want and getting me into potential trouble.. if there was a rifle inside? i am 100% sure tt u wont lock it too.. cos it isnt in ur genes to think of others..

i dislike a lot of things in the bunk too.. i am showing my attitude more n more.. i think it should be time to take the uno back home.. some players are damn childish.. displayin how hot their temper are when the game isnt in their way.. some slammed the cards.. for ur info.. those arent my cards.. i need to return to ppl in gd condition.. even if they are my cards.. who the fk gave u the permission to attitude in front of me?!

in games i hate ppl to kb me.. esp when u commit tt "offence" more than me.. when u are slow and laggy dont yell at ppl when they are slow occasionally.. ppl need to think abit.. for ur case.. u are jus stoning n oblivious of wats occurring arnd u since u arent payin attention to the game.. i hate ppl to piss me off.. it was the first time in NS i glared at others.. i dont want to do tt anymore.. i do haf a limit to my tolerance.. i am ready for any disagreement w my point of view cos wat i see others may be the same way ppl see me..

life in camp isnt tt pleasant to me (recently) but as for the at home.. my mom is getting on my nerves too.. i guess it is jus too normal.. asking too much irrelevant insiginifcant qns.. there are a lot of things she doesnt need to noe.. for noeing them doesnt help her in anything.. tts jus my opinion n way of seeing things.. it has been a norm to hear ppl say i am bad to my mom.. i guess it is jus the way u are brought up and how each n every individual thinks and shapes his idea of how ppl should react arnd him.. somethings cant be changed but can be reduced, avoided.. i will gladly avoid ppl who pisses me off.. less interaction w them..

i inherited my mom's temper.. so it is virtually impossible for us to quarrel.. she gets agitated easily when talkin to my dad.. i get agitated easily talkin to her.. the cycle goes round and round.. so i see no pt my mom complainin to me abt my attitude when hers isnt tt gd as a role model too.. if u cant do it (almost everytime) why u expect me to behave in another way? unfilial - watever u call it.. my notion of being filial is different.. i will repay any kindness anyone shows me.. my tone down my volume when i speak.. mayb bcos of my dyin throat.. speakin of which.. some bastards in the company or the platoon dont sing or echo.. they simply heck care..

i guess i wont be smuggling food in anymore.. seriously it isnt worth it at all.. if it is one for all n all for one.. i dont mind i being the only one getting caught.. this reminds me of another issue i wanna kb..

i smuggle in food.. ppl noes.. when heard tt there will be a check goin on.. ppl come to me giving me tt "u are in deep shit" look.. tt's not helping.. after i clear my checks.. some of those ppl come n request for food.. i can only say ur EQ is damn low.. this sounds really mean (but it feels gd to say it): this kind of low life-form doesnt deserve to exist in this world.. ur existence is one of the main reasons y the world is in a mess now.. i feel ashame of ppl like ur kind breathin the same air as me..

back to my old ways! i feels so gd to kb.. kb me back for all those out tt.. cos i simply dun give a damn.. ur existence is insignificant to me..

qk the great.. ego u call it.. i haf loads of pride being myself..

there are quite a large no. of nice ppl in camp.. some really make me feel much better.. however, it only takes a few to spoil the show (quotes from sergeant).. i hate to be being bossed arnd by ppl whom i see dont fit.. if u think u are gd.. show me tt u are better than me at everythin.. den i will keep my mouth shut.. if u boss ppl arnd tellin others to do this do tt.. but u dont do.. i can only show u the finger.. n forget abt getting respect from me.. cos to me.. u simply suck..